Silencing Self-Doubt: 5 Steps to Overcome Your Insecurities

October 6, 2017  Amber Olson Rourke Avatar
Silencing Self-Doubt: 5 Steps to Overcome Your Insecurities

During rare moments of downtime, I find myself reflecting on how different my life and mindset are now compared to 10 years ago. The funny thing is that if I had listened to the voice in my head when I started my career, none of this would ever have become my reality. I struggled for a long time with self-doubt, especially starting out in this business. There were so many areas where I felt I might not be “enough.” I’m too young to be taken seriously. I am too inexperienced to be a leader. This list goes on… Despite working extremely hard these “not enough” thoughts silenced me into not fully stepping into my role as a leader. I had to learn how to re-write the narrative that was going on in my head.

If I had succumbed to my self-doubt, I would have given up a decade ago. I would have safely stayed in my comfort zone, too fearful to dream big and too fearful to act on my dreams. If there’s one thing I’ve learned over the past decade, it’s this: If you doubt your power, you give power to your doubt.

Climb Your Way to the Top

We all have dreams, hopes, and passions. Even though we set goals for ourselves, it’s human nature to doubt the process and to doubt our own ability. You may have heard me say this before, but when your comfort becomes more important to you than your calling, misery is imminent. If self-doubt prevents you from chasing your goals, you’ll never reach the top. The time is now to silence your self-doubt. If you don’t do it for yourself. No one will.

Push Past Your Comfort Zone

One of many lessons my dad taught me is complacency has never lead to the creation of anything. All great moments in life comes after you risk something for them. Taking risks is an essential part of being successful. As if taking risks isn’t stressful enough, critics will likely surface while you’re pursuing your goals. That’s ok. In fact, that’s great! Here’s how I deal with critics: Never let anyone who’s not brave enough to pursue their own dreams, diminish yours.

The Danger Zone

Here’s the thing: Sometimes, it’s hard to not listen to what critics say. Whenever you hear that voice in your head that tells you that you’re not good enough or you don’t deserve your good fortune, remember, you have a choice to either succumb to the criticism and be silenced or decide that your dreams are too important to be silenced. The decision is yours. Be courageous, and never forget that courage is not the absence of fear but rather courage is the acquired ability to move beyond that fear.

Live an Unsilenced Life

This is how I see it: You have two choices. Either you stay where you are, and there’s nothing wrong with being content. Or push past your fears and imagine the possibilities that will become available to you. For this reason, I would love to share a few tips that have helped me push past my fears and silenced my self-doubt:

  1. Identify Silencers: Pay attention to the unproductive and negative self-doubts that appear in your mind. They likely surface when you think about going after a goal or trying something new. Once you’re able to recognize those mental roadblocks, you’ll find it much easier to replace those negative thoughts with positive ones. Think about it this way, if you’re only focusing on your perceived flaws or on what could go wrong in any given situation, it becomes impossible to focus on everything that could go right — and, that’s where your head must be!
  2. Overcome Self-Doubt with Positive Affirmations: Use affirmations as a way of reprogramming your mind into believing the stated concept. You see, your subconscious mind doesn’t know the difference between what’s real and what’s not; so, by replacing those negative beliefs with positive stated beliefs you’re consciously and unconsciously learning to think in a new way. If you’re worried about getting started, here are a few examples.
  3. Invest in Yourself: Make the time to read 10 pages of a personal growth book a day or listen to 10 minutes of an uplifting podcast. Take the time each day to grow your “belief muscle” so when you need to use it to push past your fears you’ll be ready.
  4. Surround Yourself with People You Want to Be Like: You are the average of the five people you surround yourself with the most. Take stock of who those five people are and make sure that they are people who believe in you and lift you up. If you want to have more confidence, surround yourself with confident people.
  5. Shake the Haters Off: One of the hardest decisions you will make on your success journey is distancing yourself from “haters” and deciding to listen to your calling, not your critics. And here is a fact — the more success you obtain, the more critics you’ll have. It has to be true, even T-Swift wrote a song about it! 😉

Remember, people aren’t naturally born gifted leaders. What true leaders do differently is that they move beyond fear because they know their calling is more important than their comfort which is why I’m going to ask you this: since your story is still unwritten and you get to write the ending, share with us how your story will end. Will it end in comfort or in courage?

Let’s continue the conversation on a Facebook Live Event this coming Wednesday, October 11, at 4:30 p.m. CST. Visit my Facebook page on the day at the right time and click on the LIVE event displayed at the top of the page or send this link to prospects. If you’re sharing the event with a prospect, they must LIKE my page prior to watching us LIVE.

Follow me on social media: @AOlsonRourke

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